Have you been the victim of Narcissistic Abuse? Do you need tools to deal with Narcissistic Abuse?
This abuse is not limited to a romantic relationship, it could also be (as mentioned above) from your parents, other family member/s, siblings, a work colleague or a boss, a teacher, even friends, anyone in an authoritative position.
Narcissism has been more in the spotlight in recent years, and yet there are still many misconceptions and misunderstanding about what it is. Those who have been through Narcissistic Abuse tend to agree: it destroys your body, mind, and your soul, your life, your self-esteem, your sanity, your health, your friendships, your support network, your other relationships, your self-worth, it can feel like you are losing your grip on your sanity!
The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM–5), the handbook therapists use to diagnose personality disorders, identifies the nine traits that make up a Narcissistic Personality Disorder. While the DSM does not break down NPD into subtypes (and therefore these are not official diagnoses), others have identified various types of narcissists. It can be helpful to recognize them so you can steer clear the next time you encounter these traits in a potential partner.
-
The Overt Type
Known as grandiose narcissism, this is what we typically think of when we talk about a narcissist. These people are usually extroverted, grandiose, aggressive, and attention-seeking. They can be very charming and typically expect special treatment. They can be predatory in their ability to see vulnerability in others and use it against them. They are highly competitive and are willing to humiliate others to gain a perceived win.
-
The Covert Type
Sometimes referred to as “narcissistic vulnerability,” this type of person tends to be passive-aggressive but comes across as very helpless. They tend to present themselves as victims and are quick to cry or stage a crisis to gain attention. They also tend to struggle with anxiety and or depression.
-
The Hypervigilant Type
These types of narcissists tend to be highly sensitive to the body language, facial reactions, tone, and reactions of others. They tend to take things personally and be hypersensitive to criticism. They are prone to feeling shame or humiliation and can be self-effacing. They are likely to direct action towards others and prefer not to be the centre of attention.
-
The Oblivious Type
While most narcissists are unaware of the feelings of others, this type is known for being completely lacking in awareness and sensitivity towards others. They are missing that sensitivity chip. They are self-absorbed, arrogant, aggressive, and need to be the centre of attention.
-
The Exhibitionist Type
The need for constant attention is like a bottomless pit for these people. They think they are better than others physically and intellectually. They look down on others, even their friends and family. They are very status conscious and materialistic. They think they are very special and have an enormous need to be admired all the time.
-
The Sexual Type
The sexual narcissist feels entitled to have their sexual needs met. They have a self-centred view of sex and tend to not be skilled at emotional intimacy and therefore are not very interested in their partner’s needs. They frequently overestimate their skills in the bedroom because they are not very tuned into their partners. Yet, they need and expect a lot of praise for their performance in bed. They react poorly to sexual rejection. They expect sex in return for gifts or nice gestures and will pressure, trick, or manipulate you into having sex with them. They feel entitled to get sex elsewhere if you do not meet their sexual requirements, regardless of your agreement about monogamy.
-
The Malignant Type
This dangerous type of personality disorder is really a cross between narcissistic personality disorder and what mental health practitioners call antisocial personality disorder. This means that they cannot feel empathy. They are what pop psychology calls a ‘psychopath’ or ‘sociopath’. These aggressive, hostile, paranoid people are sadistic and dehumanizing to those around them. Many experts believe that Adolf Hitler was a malignant narcissist. This is the most dangerous type of narcissist and if you think you might be dating one, run for the hills. This type of person will hurt you physically, emotionally, financially, sexually and not bat an eye or have any remorse.